Panicacci Loves Jake Paul

By: Lucy Panicacci

Culture Editor

In 2017, I was a dedicated Logan Paul and Jake Paul stan. I would unashamedly go home every day in the fifth grade and watch a Paul video. I have to admit, these videos shaped who I am today. The most important part of my daily routine was the fifteen minutes I spent observing an array of 20-year-olds terrorizing their neighbors, almost setting their house on fire, and mistreating their friends. However, for my 10-year-old self, it was “everyday bro.” 

For years, I repressed this era of my life. I lived life with blissful ignorance, but all of it came rushing back a few days ago when I went to check my YouTube history. To my utter shock, I found months of comments under Jake and Logan Paul’s videos. Believe it or not, my first liked video ever is a Logan Paul music video, and to make it even better, I commented on that video, “Logan is our hero.” Now, if that isn’t brainwashing, I don’t know what is.

Along with my idolization of the Paul brothers, I was also deeply involved in their lives. I offered them my best wisdom from the bottom of my 10-year-old heart. Under one video, I advised, “Logan should make his car dark navy blue.” Was there a need for this comment? I don’t know, but I just knew his car would look extra snazzy with a navy blue shine. I truly wanted the best for Logan.

Because of them, I will forever have the lyrics of “The Fall of Jake Paul” ingrained in my mind. I whole-heartedly believe that song actually rearranged my brain cells. When people say that music sounded better when they were younger, “The Fall of Jack Paul” is definitive evidence of that. Nothing hit harder than the drama of Alissa Violet stepping out of that car.

As much of a fan as I once was, I am also a critic at heart. While I was scrolling through my history, I started to see a trend. As it went on, my comments got more fed up and upset. The fall of Jake and Logan Paul had begun. Oct. 10, 2017 marked this dark turn. On that fateful day, I said, “This is what happens when Jake Paul runs out of content.” Don’t let the lack of development of my prefrontal cortex fool you. 10-year-old me knew when I was not getting the best, most top-notch content.

Despite my eventual hatred for the Paul brothers, I owe them so much. They transformed my judgment about what is right and wrong. I went from thinking that setting a massive fire in your pool that reached the roof of your house was really cool to considering the slight possibility that maybe it’s a disturbance and dangerous to your neighbors. For that, I am thankful.

Categories: Humor

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