Humor

Duvall laments the senior lot

By: Emily Duvall 

Opinion Editor

Years of middle school PE miles have prepared you for this very moment. The moment of truth. The final test. The clock strikes 2:20 (or 2:25 on even days, xoxo LGHS). The mad dash begins. In a split second, the world turns to chaos. Mobs of crazed students pour out of classrooms all across the land. It is each person for themselves. To your right, your second grade desk buddy sprints wildly past the New Tech Building throwing caution to the wind, backpack swinging aggressively to and fro. Where are they going, you may ask? The senior lot. 

My dearest peers and I in the Class of 2023 are now seniors, if you did not already know. We are now the class unapologetically jogging and sprinting to our cars. I never thought it would be our turn to do this, but here we are. As a senior of barely one month, I am here to specifically inform all of you loyal readers about my observations and inferences after the first few weeks of driving chaos. 

Say goodbye to your 3:00 dentist appointment. It’s not gonna happen. Unless you received the sub six minute mile shirt in middle P.E., you have no chance. If you are not in your car checking to make sure no one is speeding at you, taking off your backpack, and clicking on your seatbelt in the span of ten seconds, say goodbye to the next 30 minutes of your day. Not to mention, you should already be at your car precisely one minute after the bell rings in addition to the other tasks. 

People show their true colors once the car line begins to build. I have lost friends in the senior lot. I cannot express the profound betrayal I feel when my sixth grade bestie doesn’t let me into the never-ending line of cars. Did our friendship mean nothing? Don’t even get me started about the people who cut through the teacher parking lot to pass half the senior student body. Did nobody teach you about bucket dipping in elementary school? Want to get on my good side? Let me cut in front of you. In return, we can now be best friends for life. I might even throw in a Dio chai for free.

The senior lot provides so much good content to talk about, as it is filled with excitement, road rage, and occasional crashes. In my one whole month as a senior, I have learned compassion, humility, and patience, traits I will carry with me throughout the rest of my life. I have grown for the better, but do not test me just yet.

Categories: Humor

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